Worst Birthday Ever, Or Is It?
by Drucilla Havok
Summary: Haku thinks Zabuza forgot his birthday and is upset. He likes Zabuza even though 'he only veiws him as a tool'. But when he gets back from the party, Haku gets a suprize from Zabuza that will change things forever. Yaoi, possibly yuri, enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is my first fanfic to be typed; I don't think I'm ready for multiple chapters yet. However, with encouragement and how much thought I can put into this before I get severely bored and turn it into complete and utter crack to the point where even I can't even tell if there's a plot and am not capable of telling how something came together might change my ever changing and constantly over thinking mind. Please, please read and review. Warning, it may suck!

Disclaimer: I only own the made up characters, Kami (Ka-me), Ty-Lee, Techidie (Tec-E-die), Shaiala (Shy-al-la), Saru and Jinx. I do not own the series or any other characters, if I did, Sasuke would have committed suicide after realizing what an ass he is.

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Today is Haku's Sixteenth birthday; Zabuza has yet to say anything about it. He got a call from his best friend, Zabuza's younger twin sisters and a few others, including Naruto who dumped him on Valentine's Day. Haku's sensei has been there for him since he was five, yet his forgetful and immature ex., that met him only three years ago and mistook him for a girl then didn't see for two years after the fight on the bridge, wished him a happy birthday.

'What a douche.' Haku thinks to himself as he wipes a tear from his eye and buries his head into the fluffy rainbow striped pillow Saru, Zabuza's seventeen-year-old sister, had made for him when he came out of the closet two years ago as a sign of her support. Saru and her silver haired, yet still identical even though she herself has black hair like her brother, twin sister Shaiala have been like sisters to him ever since the day they met when they (the twins) met him. 'Strange coincidence, I met his sisters on their birthday and Zabuza never realized it was also my birthday. He can remember theirs, but he can't remember mine when it's on the same day… he hardly ever sees them any more, yet it's rush off to celebrate their birthday and abandon me for the day… even though they may want to see me too… does he ever think of me? I wonder if he even knows I'm human…' he rants in his head as he reaches for the teddy bear Kami, his best friend, gave him on his tenth birthday, then starts sobbing.

A few minutes later, Techidie (also known as Techie, Die-Dei, Dead -Bitch -Walking, Pain -In -The -Ass, Ally-Cat, Kitty, Ex.-Akastuki-Whore and Girl- Who –Needs- Duct –Tape- Over- Her- Mouth -24/7/365), calls. "Hello, Haku." She says, sounding friendly- she must be either horny or bored.

"Hi, Die-Die, what do you want?" Haku rudely grumbles after a couple of sniffles and wiping the tears from his now puffy brown eyes.

"What's wrong, did a girl try touching you again?" Techidie asks, sounding concerned even though she's the only girl ever to try touching him inappropriately and the only that would.

"No, and if one did I sure as hell would never tell you, it'd give you ideas!" Haku exclaims, then pulls some tear soaked dark brown hair out of his face and calmly says, "Zabuza forgot my birthday, again. I don't get how he can forget my birthday, but remember his sisters' when it's on the same day."

"Hey, I know you're almost considered a genius and everything, but did you ever tell him when your birthday is? Or even consider that since he only thinks of you as a tool, that he doesn't give two shits and that's why he only celebrates Saru and Shaiala's birthday?" Techidie ponders as she plays with her lip ring and flips her long silver and black striped hair over her shoulder.

"I reminded him for weeks and he actually asked me what I wanted…."

"Maybe he was humoring you…"

"He'd never do that…"

"I've known him and his sisters since I was four…"

"Doesn't say much, you're what, five years old?"

"Excuse me, I'm eighteen!"

"So, why **did** you call?"

"To wish you a happy birthday, it's common courtesy and the birthday cake Kami bought and decorations reminded me."

"Still same old Techidie, huh?"

"Yeah…"

"Still getting quickies from random men and women?"

"Wouldn't be me if I wasn't!" Techidie chuckles as she thinks about what happened last night between her and Haku's dream guy, Zabuza Momochi.

"You had sex last night, huh?" Haku guesses, raising an eyebrow suggestively even though he knows it's pointless to do so since he's on the phone.

"Of course! Although I'd rather not talk about it since Kami may over hear and tell the twins which would ruin my friendship with them."

"Zabuza, again…"

"Duh… his cock is too hard to stay away from, no matter how much the twins threaten."

"How long is it?"

"Haku, you naughty, naughty boy! Why would I tell you?"

"It's tiny isn't it?"

"No, second biggest one I've seen and considering I've slept with twenty guys and saw you naked while tending to your wounds, which means I've seen twenty-one guys naked, that says a lot."

"You have to bring that up, now, of all times!"

"Quit complaining damn it! Listen, Ty-Lee, Kami, Shaiala, Saru, Naruto, Piggy, Shikamaru, Lee, Sakura, and a few others **that do care** about you are having a get together after the twins' party, so cheer up and get you ass over to Kami's room at the inn. Also, do yourself a favor, do not drool over Kami's boyfriend and forget about Zabuza, you and I both know he'll never return your feelings for him." Techidie advises as she gets a random image of Gaara, Kami's boyfriend, ballroom dancing with a giant chocolate bunny wearing Kami's clothes. (Piggy= Ino).

"Not in the mood for parties, especially after your 'advice' about Zabuza." Haku mumbles as he holds his teddy bear closer.

"Haku, you are going and that is final! Today is your birthday and you will be around those who care about you, you will meet Kami's boyfriend, you will forget about Zabuza and you will not spend the entire day alone! I don't fucking care if I have to drag you here then tie up to keep you here damn it!" Techidie insanely threatens then hangs up before Haku can protest.

"Damn it, I want to be alone to wallow in my own misery! What part of that does she not understand?" Haku yells as he slams the phone down after realizes his friend hung up on him, then heads to the shower. He might as well get ready; he knows Techidie's serious and if he's tied up, she'll make a bondage slave out of him. Sadly, she has tried it before and almost succeeded and would have

A/N: OK, there will be more than one chapter and I like it so far. Also, if any wants to be my Beta reader or me to be theirs, please let me now!  Sincerely, Drucilla Havok.


	2. Chapter 2

Five minutes later, Haku steps out of the shower and grabs a fluffy white towel. He dries himself off, thinking about everything he wants to do to Zabuza, even though he's still upset with him. Haku raps the towel around himself, mind still occupied with Zabuza, and walks over his suitcase. He takes out his favorite kimono, the pink flowered one, and puts it on. Then he combs out his long brown hair. After that, he heads over to Kami's room and knocks on the door.

The door opens and standing in the door way is his worst nightmare – a scantily clad Shaiala Momochi next to a kunoichi of The Village Hidden in The Rain that calls herself Jinx, wearing next to nothing. "Hi Haku, what's up!" The girls cheerfully greet him.

The second Haku steps inside his favorite grass ninja (only grass ninja he's met other than Zetsu, who he didn't exactly like) comes barreling toward him in a blur of black and knocks him over out of excitement. The ninja looks up, her silver bangs flopping in her tan face while her messy black hair looks almost like a blanket over the two of them as it spreads over her body. "I missed you Haku!" She says as she props herself up on her long, strong, scarred tan arms. She is also sixteen, like Haku, although she has been in hundreds more battles than her best friend.

"Kami, I thought your aim would be getting better by now." Haku teases his best friend. They met on the streets of the mist village when they were little, Kami ran away when she was seven and hadn't seen him again until Zabuza got a mission in the Land of Waves, and she had been working for Gato as a mercenary for a year, at that point and was already a jonin. Haku was the equivalent of a chunin, although he technically was, and still is, a genin.

"So this is how you greet me, with a completely cliché joke!" Kami sarcastically complains with a slight chuckle, her black eyes lighting up a little and getting off Haku.

Once the two have stood up, Haku notices that there's a male stripper stripping on the coffee table, Techidie's doing no doubt. The stripper has long blonde hair, blue eyes, medium skin tone, and abs and there's an Akastuki robe at his big feet. "Who's that?" Haku asks, his curiosity getting the best of him.

"Deidara, he's my present to you." Techidie answers then thinks for a couple of seconds and continues, " Sorry we couldn't wait until you got here to enjoy him, but he's available, is into guys and has the third biggest cock I've seen."

"Now I'm curious, who has the biggest?" Haku asks, slightly annoyed that all Techidie ever talks about are boobs, vaginas and cocks.

"Kabuto has the smallest and Kakashi has the biggest." Techidie shrugs.

"Hey Haku, happy birthday!!" Ty-Lee over excitedly cheers, running up to give him a hug.

With Ty-Lee's arms around him, Haku mumbles to his lesbian friend, "Hi, Ty-Lee, can you get your hands off me now?"

Ty-Lee, a little annoyed, points out, "You weren't uncomfortable with Kami on you…"

Shaiala, now on the coffee table (horrible idea since she's in three inch heels and has awful balance for a kunoichi who took ballet lessons when she was little and is a master in judo, tae kwon do, kung-fu and karate) and is hitting a butter knife on an empty whine glass (bad idea since she may break the glass) to get everyone's attention. Then, when the silvery haired seventeen-year-old bitch has their undivided attention (takes a while since her friends always assume she's bitching about something or has PMS and feels like taking it out on them), she announces, "Our guest of honor has arrived, everyone give a warm welcome to Haku!" Everyone starts clapping because they're afraid Shaiala or her sister may kick their ass if they don't (not including Gaara). "Haku, get your ass up here!" Shaiala orders, her yellow eyes narrowing into a glare.

Haku steps up onto the table and Techidie, Naruto, Saru, Deidara, Jinx and Rock Lee start chanting "Strip tease!"

Haku sticks his middle finger up at them and Shaiala slaps him upside the head, almost knocking him down – the girl can literally lift five hundred pounds without breaking a sweat and could give Naruto a concussion using her bare hands without even trying. Haku glares at Shaiala after she says, "Let's all sing 'Happy Birthday'!"

With that, the cake, introductions and presents out of the way, Haku slips out of the room and goes back to his. It's not like he didn't appreciate what they were trying to do; he's just not in the mood for it and wants to be alone. Unfortunately, he has to leave his favorite present, Deidara, there or everyone will notice he left and Techidie will make him into a bondage slave. Why couldn't Deidara be **his **bondage slave or Zabuza?

A/N: Sorry it's short, but it gets my point across.


	3. Chapter 3

He gets back to the room at the inn that he shares with Zabuza and is immediately turned on upon opening the door – Zabuza's lying in Haku's bed naked, and looking straight at him! Haku's pale face flushes with shades of red and pink. Zabuza just stares intently, waiting for his roommate's response. Haku is physically incapable of moving he's so shocked – more shocked than he was when he found out Ty-Lee is a Satanist lesbian. Zabuza, who doesn't even have bandages over his mouth, gives Haku a sexy crooked smirk, "Take your clothes off." He calmly and smoothly requests.

Haku doesn't know what to do; he wants the rogue ninja so bad it hurts but Techidie said he'll never return his feelings for him and wants to respect that. "B-but… y-you… told me, you t-told e-everyone that I am just a t-tool… w-why?" He stammers.

Zabuza gives the gay shinobi a weird look, "Well, you are a tool, but even a tool's sixteenth birthday is special." He chuckles.

"S-so, you know when my birthday is?" Haku says, finally able to move and walks into the room, closing the door behind him.

Zabuza gets up and walks toward Haku. "Yes, always have, just didn't think it was a big deal, Haku, but you're a man now – in my eyes at least – and what better way to celebrate than some sake and sex?" He grins.

Haku backs up a little, hoping Zabuza doesn't notice he's getting hard. "B-but T-Techidie... last n-night with her – w-why? I-If you l-like me?" He stutters, his face blood red from blushing.

"I was hoping to forget about you, you're my apprentice and even though I knew you liked me, I couldn't do it." Zabuza whispers in Haku's ear as he slides up behind him. Haku gets even harder, he can't take Zabuza being this close with his muscular body unclothed. Zabuza grabs Haku's balls and purrs, "Take your clothes off before I take them off for you." In Haku's ear. When Haku doesn't move, Zabuza leads him over to a bed, gets on top of him and starts kissing his soft, sweet lips that taste like vanilla cake with chocolate frosting.

This is much more than Haku can take, his mind is spinning out of confusion and bliss. Today started as the worst day of his life and now it's turning into the best. Zabuza's kisses trail down his flawless neck and to his collarbone. Zabuza's big, strong hands loosen Haku's kimono, then takes it off. Haku's face becomes redder. Zabuza trails kisses down to Haku's boxers and continues as he pulls Haku's boxers off. Haku runs his long, slender fingers through Zabuza's rough black hair as Zabuza's mouth encloses around his erection.

A few minutes later, Zabuza is going up and down on Haku. Swells of pleasure go through their bodies and the two cum at the same time.

This goes on for a good half hour, then Zabuza collapses on the young man out of exhaustion, takes a rest after pulling a blanket over them and slides off him.

A/N: Sorry this is crappy and has little detail on the yaoi part, but I can't think of how to describe it.


End file.
